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In 2011, I had bought a house, learned I was going to
graduate early, received a 5,000 dollar scholarship, and had some great
friends, but I was missing a love life. I wondered why can’t it all be great at
the same time, come to realize it was me being selfish, because the other great
blessings were enough.
My dear friend posed the question to me, “Can we have
success and a love life at the same time?” I think the question is will our
friends, loved ones, and sometimes even our family grow with us?
I don’t have the same high school friends, or the same
college friends anymore. One of my close girlfriends is the one that posed
this question to me. I wish she was not so far away. We have the same goals in
life. We want to be successful, and we fight most definitely, but it is never a
blow out.
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If you want to be successful, it does not mean you have to loose friends. You should never have to choose. Don’t look at it that way. The friends that are truly there for you, and understand your goals will never leave you. When I went home for five months to revamp myself, friends I thought were my friends did not talk to me. I could have taken that has a negative, which I did at the time. However, looking back I was just not in there sight anymore and was forgotten. THAT IS OKAY.
In saying that, if a friend is full of drama or negative all
the time, I do not want to surround myself with that. I make a conscious
decision to just let go that is not loosing friends that is only controlling what
you and you must surround yourself with people that make you better. It is the
same in a relationship. I want to be with someone that makes me better, where
we can both bring out the best in each other, not the worst.
Before I met this guy, I thought I would not have a relationship for years. I don’t have one yet, but this looks promising. He is focused on making the air force a career, and I am focusing on making broadcast a successful career. We both understand that aspect. You should never hold a burden over someone’s shoulder, because they are so focused on their goals in life.
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It’s funny, because I consider my friend the “Miranda of Sex
and the City.” She is very driven and knows what she wants. I am the same way,
but I tend to write a lot, so I try to play the role of Carrie. Ha We have both
left friends and future boyfriends, because we knew that it will never work out
with our life direction. You should never settle, because it is the "norm."
You can have your cake and eat it too, just realize what you need in your life and what you don’t. My mom gave me the greatest advice; “Don’t second guess yourself, when you feel like it is the right thing to do, do it.” You made your bed and now lie in it. If you go back to those decisions, you will wonder the inevitable “what if?” All that does is ruin your confidence and effect all your other decisions, specifically trying to become successful. Stick to your guns!
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