Before I moved to Fort Worth literally in a week's time I had three guys pop back into my life for a brief second. One I have always had an on and off thing with, the other was a friend from high school who use to run track, and the last one is in the military and we had a brief stint last fall. All three of these guys I was pretty interested in again.
A little background on the first guy. He pops in and out of my life every couple times a year. We have had huge arguments, but have always managed to stay in contact somewhat through the years. The only problem we have is he wants one thing out of the relationship and I want another. Our egos collide really bad too. We both are successful and we both want to be the bread winners, but location and career path is not helping us meet in the middle. Recently, we were messaging each other and it seemed like everything was good again, and now four weeks have passed and not a word. This did not surprise me.
Guy numero dos is a funny story. We ran track in high school together. I met him when I was a freshman and he was an eighth grader in another district. He was the fastest male sprinter in our district and I was the fastest female sprinter in our district. The athletic attraction was adorable. We talked for a couple years. I got in a serious relationship with someone else and so did he. Eight years pass and we end up in Lubbock together, and saw each other among mutual friends. Long story short, he comes to my going away party and we tell old stories to our friends about our track days. We reconnected and I felt we had picked up right we left off EIGHT YEARS AGO. It's like a Nicholas Sparks movie, I know it's corny. I move to Fort Worth four days later, and haven't heard from the guy. Also, I am pretty sure he now has a girlfriend or at least someone he is interested in. I don't know if you followed my timeline in this paragraph, but that would be three weeks after we reconnected.
I don't even know where to start with the third one that hit me up right before I left. Last year, we were introduced while he was overseas. I have never done the military thing, so I gave it a shot. Started falling for the guy via Skype, weird I know, but true. I told him we should chill until he gets back and I can actually meet him face to face. I messed that up. During Christmas, I had the opportunity to meet him when HE invited me out, and then he preceded to flirt with someone else the entire night. That's cool, I'm over that, but I'm not over what I felt for him. According to my emotional reaction, I actually really like the dude. We didn't talk again until a week before I moved to Fort Worth for a total of eight months of silence and NOW he hits me up.... and of course I saw him before I left. He wants to be friends and I said, "I don't think I can do that, but it was fun while it lasted." Trying to act cool and collected. Truth be told, still thinking about the dude, and have heard a little bit from him while here in the metroplex, but nothing to be hopeful about.
All in all these three dudes were messing with my head for a solid week and then they have seemed to disappear. I know one is because of distance, the other looks to be moving on quickly, and the last one I have no clue about. I am hoping to find a man here in Fort Worth and build a future with him. However, I am not going to deny the fact that I entertained the thought of going back to my past. It is hard not to. They will always hold a special place in my heart and with one I feel that there is unfinished business, which always eats at me. I hope it is not just a physical issue, because I assure you I will be looking damn good come Christmas when I will probably run into them. That's about as confident of a statement I will ever make, so don't mistake that for cockiness, I am just determined. Any who gotta love timing, but I know it all happened for a reason and if they were honestly that interested we would still be communicating....trying to be brutally honest with myself. In other news my love life still sucks and the sky is still blue. Moving on....
Here are some new jams I am really digging lately. Enjoy!
No comments:
Post a Comment